1. |
Pissing In the Wind
03:38
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I feel like I'm pissing in the wind and nothing I do really counts.
I haven't got paper to spend, but I spend all of my time laying around.
How can you misunderstand when I've filled up notebooks describing
how beaten and tired I am? How could you think that I'm lying?
Because I've spent so much time fucking lying.
I lack the motivation to ever come close to the top.
I'll lay on my couch complaining and waiting for the day I finally drop.
I promised my friends I would quit drinking and get over this hump.
I claw my way out of this pit to the rooftops and wish I could jump.
I wish I had the balls to jump.
I'm dealing with life, growing old, and starting not to care anymore.
I will forget, so I'm told. Towards that I'm looking forward.
Dust myself off, and move forward.
I lack the motivation to ever come close to the top.
I'll lay on my couch complaining and waiting for the day I finally drop.
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2. |
Someone To Talk To
03:30
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I sat on my ledge for six whole hours with illusions of privacy.
Inside my fridge a demon towers and plays the organs inside of me.
I made friends this year but I lost more. At least I'm happier than I once was.
Full of fear I threw a torch to almost everything except my drugs.
"If I'm pissing you off just let me know and I'll go home.
I just need someone to talk to. I don't need to be alone."
Homeless man in an alley has my suicide note in hand.
I'm selfish 'cause I've somewhere to walk to, and HE couldn't even stand.
Mark my words, I'm well aware of any problems that I may have had.
Liquor first even though my friends were there. I guess this issue didn't seem so bad.
I walk the street until I crash and burn. I HOPE I MAKE IT TO THE HOUSE TONIGHT!?
HOW'D I KEEP TAKING THE WRONG TURN?
Cause I'd cross the street with my eyes shut tight.
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3. |
Square One
03:20
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Back to square one, I cracked my first one in two weeks.
Now I'm drunk, but I'm still not quite happy.
It's just that I'm ALONE, and these four walls LOVE to scream
that I should KILL MYSELF because I FUCK UP EVERYTHING.
MISERY TAKES OVER ME
I hold my head up high and pray that I would die.
Maybe this is why I'm alone. 'Cause I can't even make it a month
without beer that taste like shit. That doesn't MATTER because I STILL drink it.
I hope it ain't a test, because I'M just far too depressed.
Maybe there's hope? Anything can change with time.
But is time REALLY passing when the sun don't come to shine?
I watch my brother make the same mistakes as me,
and I see my FEAR in HIM when I gaze into his eyes.
I need a class or group, but I HATE PEOPLE.
I feel like I have NO USE, or that I'M INHERENTLY EVIL??
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4. |
Booze Themed Calendar
04:10
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Oh, I can't get any sleep without her laying next to me.
My reflection melts around the love/hate affection I have found.
My bottle of whiskey, how I love you. I only wish you loved me still.
Fuck all my friends and family? They can do without? This, in my mind, you instilled.
I'm gonna fucking make it through this all
'Cause I don't need no alcohol.
So many dates I lost 'cause I was married off to you.
My calendar suffered to booze.
Break out in fever, lay alone 'cause I'll hurt anyone to cope.
Brothers I hear you call my name, but I just lay in bed all day.
I know you miss me, and I love you but quitting drinking ain't a thrill.
This binge I've been on is damaging my mind. If I keep it up I'll end up killed.
"I swear we'll make it together through the shit,"
every one of them say and I believe it.
So many drunken nights spent wishing for my end
when all I needed were my friends.
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Chelsea Hates Me Elgin, South Carolina
Chelsea Hates Me is an experimental solo act made for people who’ve made a lot of mistakes. I retired this project
for
freebasedpropane.bandcamp.com/releases
Because contrary to THIS stage of my life, I'm now sober, and I've started taking responsibility for what I do.
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